There's A Moral Here
by Mird
Summary: Five fights over five stupid things between two stupid people. Five drabbles.
1. One

**Five part fic. They're practically drabbles. I'll post the next one tonight. I was going to post them all together, but I hit a bit of writer's block. I want feedback before I continue.**

**I loved this idea at first, but I don't really like how it turned out. *sigh* I need to stop angsting.**

**By the way, tomorrow (October 15****th****) is the one-year anniversary of the day I joined FFnet. Expect updates.**

[one] So she didn't buy him any ice cream at the shop. So what? He had his own money. Therefore, he could buy his own ice cream. Why did he have to make such a big deal out of everything? Was one less scoop of chocolate in his life really such a terrible ordeal? The way he moaned over it, one would think that she had deprived him of a single drop of water underneath the burning sun of the Xerxes desert.

He could have just let it go. Maybe he could have hit her once or twice (it was Ed, after all. Hoping for anything better would be silly.) and then erase the incident from his mind in favor of remembering more important things.

Instead, he had to play the magician and make a mountain of a molehill. Abracadabra! A small matter made huge with just a few simple words! Before Winry knew it, 'not giving him ice cream' turned into a terrible crime, simply begging for righteous punishment from the alleged 'victim'.

He remained stubbornly angry for days; he pushed, he shoved, he pinched, he pulled her hair- he did anything, really, that would inspire a reaction. It was enough to make a young girl fear for her safety.

It was as if he was trying to prove her wrong somehow. It almost seemed that he was trying to even the playing field; to put them back on the same level. When had she risen above him? She hadn't even noticed becoming the higher power. It could only happen through words or action, and depriving him of ice cream didn't seem like a very bold example of either.

She simply didn't understand it. Why was he so angry at her? It was just a single scoop of ice cream! He was barely missing anything. His reaction was completely out of line, as her mother would say. To think that he would get so upset over something so small.

(Though, maybe the fact that she'd called him a stupid meanie bumhead had something to do with it.)


	2. Two

**I like this one more than the first, but it's not much of an improvement. Again, not my best work.**

[two] "What are you and Al planning?"

- "What are you talking about? We aren't planning anything."

"Then what were you doing in math class?"

- "Homework."

"Why didn't you do your homework at HOME?!"

- "We were too busy planning."

"Planning WHAT?"

- "None of your business."

"Secrets secrets are no fun unless you share with everyone!"

- "Maybe you're no one, then."

"I'm not no one."

- "How do you know? Maybe me and Al are the only people that exist."

"_I_ exist, too."

- "How do you know? Prove that you exist."

"Okay."

- "OW! What was that for?!"

"If I didn't exist, that wouldn't have hurt."

- "Shut up!"

"You're a butt."

- "At least I exist."


	3. Three

**I like this one more than the other two, though I'm still not entirely fond of it.**

**I kinda fell back into my 'dialogue only' habit in the end. Never write a dialogue only fic if you can help it. You'll never want to write anything 'normally' again.**

**Bah. I fail at combining description and dialogue. Something to work on, most def.**

[three] "Ed, just sit down! You need your rest! It's only been a few months since the surgery. You can't walk yet. Get over it!" Winry shouted, regardless of the small- small and shrinking- distance between her and him. Even when crippled, he was surprisingly difficult to restrain.

"Just let me up, you stupid-" His hip bumped against the bedside table-turned-storage-rack. His face betrayed him and showed pain; a quick wince which he was able to cleverly transform into his usual annoyed grimace at the last second.

After seven months of dealing with his constant griping and complaining, she knew how to take full advantage of his temporary lapse in resistance. She noticed him hide his pain, and she knew exactly how long it took to lift up her wrench and bring it down again upon his thick skull.

"OW! What the hell was that for?!" he yelled. He fell back into the sea of pillows that acted as a second mattress. His back was already straining from the sheer weight of the prosthetic limb; why deprive him of the small amount of comfort that she was able to offer?

He groaned theatrically and rubbed his head. "I bet there's a bump now," he muttered, glaring sharply at her. "A big, huge bump. It's all your fault. Will you please just let me go outside?"

"No, Ed," she said as she painstakingly reorganized her display of automail supplies.

"But it's nice out!" he whined.

"You sound like a little kid," she scolded.

"You sound like a mom."

"I think all this time inside is making you grow _backwards_. Both in maturity and in height," Winry said.

"Are you calling me small?" Ed asked accusingly.

"There we go!" Winry smiled and put the last screw back into its proper place as she completely ignored her bedridden friend.

"Let me go outside!"

"No," she said simply without giving him so much as a glance.

"Bitch."

Instinctively, she reached for her wrench. "_Excuse me_? Did you just call me a bitch?"

"It's only fair; you called me a stupid meanie bumhead. And then you refused to give me ice cream."

"Ed, that was years ago. I'll get you some ice cream now, though."

"No thanks," Ed said. He rested his good hand on the bed frame for support and planted his foot firmly on the floor. "I can get it myself."

"I think not," she replied slyly, grabbing his arm to hold him back. She easily shoved him back into the bed. If she had told him a year ago that she would one day be able to win against him in a contest of strength, he would've laughed in her face, and maybe kicked her once or twice for good measure. Even now, he would likely deny the loss.

"Stupid meanie bumhead," he muttered.

"Shorty."

"Fatass."

"Shrimp."

"Can I get up now?"

"No."

"Bitch."

* * *

**I liked the ending at first, but reading through it, I realize that…It doesn't really fit, does it? Oh well.**


	4. Four

**This has been sitting around, unfinished, for over a month. I didn't try to make this good. In fact, it fails. DEAL WITH IT. I like finishing things. :D Now, I must get back to my (somewhat shitty) novel… *annoyed grumble***

**Next chapter is the last! Are you ready?!**

[four] "Why do you break your automail so often?" Winry asked, her tone laced with annoyance. For the fourth time that month, she screwed in the same screws and, yet again, performed the painstaking process of smoothing out dents in the metal.

"Not too often," Ed countered. "Just enough to piss you off. Any less and I'd never see you."

"Any more and I'd kill you," she said icily. She concentrated on his automail with a furrowed brow and pretended to ignore the unrepressed- and probably unintended- sentiment in his words. "Smart boy."

"Of course," he said. "I'm a child prodigy, after all."

"'Child' prodigy?" she queried, with just the slightest touch of amusement in her voice.

"Let me rephrase that...I am a brilliant young genius, and someday, everyone in Amestris will worship me as such."

"Don't get your hopes up," Winry warned in a slightly sing-song voice. She hid a small smile from his view.

"Why not? Someday, everyone will worship me." He paused. "And someday, everyone will bring me ice cream whenever I ask."

She groaned theatrically. "You hold a grudge for a long time, Elric."

"Get me some ice cream, Rockbell."

"Since when do you like ice cream?" Winry prompted. "You know that ice cream has milk in it, right?"

"So?"

"Also, you would look ridiculous," Winry said matter-of-factly.

"Ridiculous? How so?"

"Sticking out your tongue to eat the ice cream. You would look ridiculous. I would laugh and laugh and laugh, because you would look like a little kid and it would be funny," Winry said wryly.

Ed stuck out his tongue.

"Haha, Elric. Yes, you do look like a little kid."

"You mean a child prodigy," Ed corrected.

"No," said Winry. "I mean a little kid."

"You're just jealous," Ed said casually. He stood up from his lazy, relaxed position on the couch and stretched. "How long until you're done with my automail?"

"I only just started," Winry replied, looking back at her work. "It'll be a few hours."

"Mm hmm..." he muttered. "Yeah. My interest has been lost. I'm bored."

"Then leave."

"I will."

He did.


End file.
